VIDEOGAME REVIEW- Mario and Luigi: Bowser’s Inside Story

Here’s my view of Nintendo DS game Mario and Luigi-Bowser’s Inside Story, from the Geeks.co.uk website.

http://www.geeks.co.uk/11874-mario-and-luigi-bowser%e2%80%99s-inside-story

Enjoy!

LARGE NOSE MAN- Chapter 4

*What is this? A continuing story about a superhero I made up, Large Nose Man. I wrote much of this many years ago, so I have edited it to make (some) sense, although it’s just a bit of fun really. One new chapter up every fortnight!*

Chapter Four

“Welcome to Nuclea Nuclear plant, where we can take any dream and mutate it horribly” said the Nuclea secretary disturbingly sweetly, as Alex Kent walked into reception. She smiled broadly at him. Alex didn’t smile back.

“Where’s the Coburn suite?” Alex asked demandingly, no time for this smiley, happy, jolly small talk.

“Do you have an appointment sir?” Asked the secretary, with a less broad smile than before, starting to suspect Alex was a bit of a moody twat, and in no way a potential partner.

“Yes, the names Alex Lane, and I’m here for a meeting which ‘moves the plot along’, apparently.” Informed Alex, matter of factly.

“Oh good, I know quite a few people have been waiting for you, the plot’s getting a little thin at the moment.” Said the secretary, while pondering if a tank could beat a nuclear powered gibbon in a fight.

“Eh? Thin plot?” Said Alex, quite clearly confused at all this third wall breaking.

“Oh…never mind” the secretary blustered. “You want the Coburn suite on floor 2, right next to the nuclear reactor room” added the secretary, deciding, in her mind, that the tank would probably win. Just.

With that, Alex took the elevator…walked down the hall…and knocked on the door.

“Come in Mr Lane” said a deep voice that permeated through the door.

“Hello, I’m here for the meeting” said Alex.

“Yes, hello, I’m Mr Webb, head of this company, and I just wanted you to sort a few papers out, my staff seem to be dropping like flies at the moment. A lot of mysterious murders, that type of thing. You don’t mind, do you?” Asked Mr Webb kindly.

“I’m not sure I can solve the problem, but I’ll try my best.” Said Alex, wishing he could of answered ‘yes I do mind, I don’t have time for you and your second rate character.’

“Thank you. I’ll just call in my secretary for some hot liquid drinks,” said Mr Webb, pressing the relevant button to contact the secretary. “That’s strange…the line’s gone dead…” said Mr Webb, suddenly concerned.

Suddenly, a knock on the door. Then a stronger knock. Then, the door flew off its hinges. Four men in camouflage suits and one in an all black suit burst in, as Alex and Mr Webb watched in amazement. The man in the immaculate black suit had a monocle on one eye, and a four inch red scar below the other. He stepped towards Alex and Mr Webb, and his monocle glinted menacingly. He smiled a smile that suggested nothing but danger. He spoke.

“Its time for the plot to start moving boys, the Doctors here!”

Part One-

http://ebtksonline.blogspot.com/2009/11/large-nose-man-chapter-one.html

Part Two-

http://ebtksonline.blogspot.com/2009/12/large-nose-man-chapter-two.html

Part Three-

http://ebtksonline.blogspot.com/2009/12/large-nose-man-chapter-three.html

FILM REVIEW- Commando (1985)

For when you just can’t find enough words to write a full review about a film… you must employ the ancient Japanese wisdom of the haiku…

Arnold must fight back

As daughter taken from him

Those bad guys will pay

Those wondering what exactly a haiku is, see here-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haiku

If anyone has any others feel free to contribute.

FILM REVIEW- Where The Wild Things Are

Where The Wild Things Are (PG)

A film so wild it won’t be caged by narrative…

Where? Empire Multiplex in Poole

Plot? Child Max (Records) loves to be wild and play outside, and one day he angers his other and runs away from home, and ends up on the island of the Wild Things, and ends up as their king. Will he manage to be worthy of such a title?

Thoughts?

Where Fantastic Mr Fox failed as a child friendly tale this does a little better.

First off, the dialogue is more child orientated friendly. There are no jokes about existentialism here. Many of the characters say and form ideas only a child would think up.

The Wild Things are part of this, as they are children in all but appearance.

There are no winks to the audience, no pop culture references or big explosions. This simply aims to give you the grit and rough edged thrill of childhood and for the most part it delivers.

But for many this will prove tiresome, and they will wait for a major plot point or just some kind of structure to come along and help them understand it all. For them it will be a painful experience.

This film lives and dies purely on its setting and mood, and director Spike Jonze has managed to pull it off to a impressive degree. Autumnal brown and oranges, the random switching of locations (going from lifeless desert to lively forest in the blink of an eye), as well as the frequently evocative cinematography mean that, at the very least, this is a world that can immerse a willing viewer.

The actual Wild Things, made through puppetry and not the easy route of cgi, are also well integrated, and you will find yourself accepting their bizarre appearance much faster than you would expect.

A mix of animal anatomy and human expressions they are incredibly odd but not once do you see them as puppets controlled off screen.

But despite all these tricky hurdles successfully leaped, along with your expectations set accordingly, the film still doesn’t quite lift off as you expect and want it to.

A lack of a satisfying character arc for Max is to be somehow expected, considering the films loose approach to narrative convention, but in the end the film is less about the characters in the film changing and developing, and more about what you personally think the film represents about childhood.

For some adults it may be a throwback to their younger days of play fights and building forts with garden chairs, and for younger patrons it may just be something to relate to, another world to escape within.

Then again, for some, it will just be a some furry animals jumping, fighting and moping around, within an unstructured rambling bore of a film. It will annoy and enthral with equal measure.

Verdict? A film that stretches a thin premise to breaking point, but possesses a convincing dreamlike world that has a physicality many children will love. (3/5)

Go Further?

· A book that is only 48 pages, made into a 101 minute film. The Gruffalo was only 32 pages and the BBC just managed 30 minutes for that…

· Quite the coincidence that actor Max Records plays the main character that is also named Max…

· I actually think the films’ trailer is more uplifting and enjoyable overall than the actual film…

Trailer?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NOkQ4dYVaM